Dealing with epilepsy · Misconceptions

The loneliness nobody talks about after a seizure

Codrin POLeave a comment

A seizure is visible.

Recovery isn’t.

That’s where things get quiet.

The moment people move on

During the seizure, people are present.

After, they relax.

Which makes sense.

For them, the event is over.

For you, it isn’t.

“Okay enough” is a strange place

You’re conscious again.
You can answer basic questions.
You’re not in immediate danger.

So: you’re fine.

Except:

  • your head feels wrong
  • your body is exhausted
  • your confidence just dropped
  • you don’t fully trust what just happened

But none of that is obvious.

So it doesn’t count.

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Dealing with epilepsy · Misconceptions

How epilepsy changes your relationship with planning

Codrin POLeave a comment

Planning used to be simple.

Now it’s layered.

Not complicated. Just… heavier.

Planning becomes risk management

It’s not just:

  • where
  • when
  • how

It’s also:

  • sleep
  • stress
  • medication timing
  • exit options
  • “what if this goes wrong”

You stop planning events.

You start planning outcomes.

Spontaneity gets expensive

“Let’s just go.”

That works if your body is predictable.

If it’s not, “just go” can turn into “pay later.”

Late nights, missed routines, extra stress — small things stack.

People call it overthinking.

It’s not.

It’s memory.

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Dealing with epilepsy · Misconceptions

What people get wrong about “looking fine” with epilepsy

Codrin POLeave a comment

“You look fine.”

That sentence does a lot of work for people.

It closes the topic. It removes discomfort. It skips the part where they might have to think a bit harder.

And if I look fine, then everything is fine.

Convenient.

Looking fine is a performance

Most of what matters isn’t visible. People might see a seizure. They don’t see what comes after.

The confusion.
The fatigue.
The quiet “something’s off” feeling that doesn’t go away just because I can stand up again.

But if I can talk, walk, respond, then the conclusion is obvious:

Back to normal.

Except it’s not.

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A friend in need
Blog · Dealing with epilepsy · Way too personal

A friend in need

Codrin PO

In my first years with epilepsy, I was scared of telling anyone about it. That’s because I was diagnosed at 14. It’s hard enough for an introvert to make friends and adding the image that epilepsy gets in society would have made it worse. In my early years, I didn’t have too many seizures and they happened at home.

Going to university, I had my first public seizure – right before taking one of my first exams. I would have preferred honestly to take the exam instead. In university, I had good friends that knew and understood me. I realized that there are people out there that actually look at the person and not at the disorder. That was good. Not teenagers, but still not adult persons (between 18-24) aren’t judgemental, it seems.

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Dealing with epilepsy

Keeping notes

Codrin PO

I first started writing down the number and dates of my seizures about 12-14 years ago, before moving from Romania to Belgium. At first, I just tried to remember the numbers of seizures I had in a year, then I remembered the dates. I remember clearly my first seizure, because, well, it was “my first” and it was in an usual setting and caused a whirlwind of things going wrong in my life.

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